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Myth #3 - Limited
Choices.
When you are in a bad marriage, there are only two
options: be miserable for life, or get even, but this myth limits one's
horizons to two equally devastating alternatives. Once the choice is made
between these alternatives, the individual becomes a prisoner of his
choice. Thousands of people live in these self-made prisons because they
believed the myth of limited choices.
Shannon and David had believed this myth. For
fifteen years they had experienced misery and contemplated divorce, but as
they left my office after six months of counseling, David said, "I
used to leave you office with rage in my heart toward her. Today I leave
realizing what a wonderful wife I have." A smile spread across
Shannon's face as she spoke. "Dr. Chapman, I never dreamed that I
could love him again and we could have a happy marriage."
Obviously, Shannon and David had broken the bondage
of limited options. There is always something you can do to improve a
marriage. Being miserable, or getting out are not your only options. There
are loving solutions even in difficult marriages.
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