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Planners and Strugglers.
Two types of young adults return home: Planners and
Strugglers.
Planners come home to prepare for independent
living. Their goals usually include saving money, paying school debts, and
building a nest egg for the future. Evidence indicates that planners
generally do well in moving home. They add vitality to their parents'
lives, and their relationships with parents usually thrive and deepen with
mutual respect and understanding.
Strugglers tend to return home out of necessity.
Their plans go no further than "living at home for a while." They find the
outside world threatening and don't want to struggle on their own. They
need more time in the nest. Parents who can respond with understanding
will help them reach the level of maturity necessary to go out on their
own and lead productive lives.
Nurturing your own marriage is extremely important
for both of these boomerang kids. They need to see a model of two adults
loving and encouraging each other through the years. Whatever else you do
make time for each other when your adult child returns home.
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