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The Question Is: Are You
Willing to Work...?
Perhaps you are saying: "I’m not sure that I want to work on my
marriage. I’ve tried. I’ve given and given. It won’t work, and I may as
well get out now!" I am deeply sympathetic with your feelings. I know that when we
have tried again and again without success, we may lose our desire to try again. We see
not hope, so we conclude that we have no alternative but to give up. Our emotions no
longer encourage us to work on the marriage.
That is why I never ask people, "Do you want to work on your
marriage?" I always ask, "Will you work on your marriage?" At the point of
separation, we have lost much of our "want to". But we must remember our values,
our commitments, and our dreams. We must make wise choices in spite of our feelings of
depression or hopelessness.
When we chose to work on our marriages, we have all the help of God. God will
not force your spouse to deal with issues and return to the marriage, but He will give you
wisdom and strength as you seek to follow His will.
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